October 2009
1 post
3 tags
FYI
Subject: BJ's 10/26/2009 from 10-11 am in the lunch room...
September 2009
8 posts
1 tag
a picture is worth a thousand words
Coworker 1: people should send pictures along with their applications
Coworker 2: like XXXX's picture?
Coworker 1: yeah. if i saw XXXX's picture, i would hire him on the spot
Coworker 3: man, the first time i met him i thought he was high
2 tags
jugular
coworker: well thats her problem she didnt read the documentation, if she did she would have seen it was missing...what can we do if she doesnt read it?
boss: well thats fine, we ll just step on her neck.
1 tag
ZOMG
Male coworker: oh thank god - paris is picking her new BFF today
3 tags
meetings part 2
later in the meeting
me: http://stuffmycoworkersays.tumblr.com/
coworker: leave me alone i don't awnt to get into trouble
1 tag
bring your laptops to meetings
boss leading meeting
me: i never realized how fast he talks
coworker: ha
coworker: hes just excited
me: boner
coworker: it's humungous
1 tag
clean record
coworker 1: i have never been in an accident
coworker 2: what about when you backed into my car ?
coworker 1: that doesn't count , it was in the parking lot
2 tags
up is down
me: hey xxx do you know who bizarro is?
coworker: like pizzaro? like mike piazza the catcher?
me: hey xxxxx do you know who bizarro is?
coworker 2: yea he was my high school math teacher. mr. bizarro.
1 tag
it looks just like him
me: is bizarro boss still outside?
me: nope hes gone
coworker: i wonder what bizarro boss would be like?
coworker: he'd probably be rational
August 2009
14 posts
2 tags
there's a time and place for everything...
coworker: all you need for college is clothing and a bong
1 tag
happy accident
me: you had a mistake?
coworker: yea
me: you didnt know if it was a boy or a girl?
coworker: ohh....
coworker: ....
coworker: yea.
2 tags
beat that thang.
Boss walks by
Boss: Wanna get beat up!?!?
1 tag
mailbox bashing
Boss walks over
Boss: Y'all need to peak your heads out when I walk by so I can slap them.
Boss walks away
3 tags
OUCH!
me: Are you going to have any more kids?
coworker: fuck no I'd rather cut my dick off!
1 tag
SPAM
Boss: What the heck is that spreadsheet?
Me: Did you read the e-mail?
Boss: All you wrote was "FYI".
Me: Right. Did you read the one e-mail right below it?
Boss: All I saw was "FYI Attachment".
Me: So you're telling me you never read e-mail trails?
Boss: No.
1 tag
Sending out an SOS
co-worker: lol
me: did you really laugh out loud?
co-worker: no
co-worker: I smiled
co-worker: sos
co-worker: Smiling out silently
4 tags
not funny, like Dane Cook
me: you there? co-worker: yea me: got a sec? co-worker: yea me:
“boss: can you please send me your time off for the next 2 months? me: well, i already took my vacation…hmm…what if i get sick? boss: no”
me: is that funny? co-worker: no <Co-worker signs off>
1 tag
no sick time for you
boss: can you please send me your time off for the next 2 months?
me: well, i already took my vacation...hmm...what if i get sick?
boss: no
1 tag
Beef...It's What's For Dinner!
Coworker: Can you review this PowerPoint presentation really quick?
Me: Sure, no problem…(scan through it)…this looks good.
Coworker: Yeah, I mean, it’s just a draft. I’m gonna stick some beef in it tonight.
1 tag
If the glove don't fit acquit!
Email:
Subject: Softball?
Hello Everyone!
XXXXX has recently asked if anyone would be interested in playing a softball game within the next couple of months. She just wanted to get a quick head count of who might be interested. If you want in just reply yes to me. Do not reply all please.
Thank you
Response:
Hi XXX:
Slow Pitch I presume? I would be interested in playing but I do not have a...
1 tag
Greatest movie of all time
Me: You have no taste in movies.
CoWorker: Yes I do.
Me: What is your favorite movie?
CoWorker: (thinks for 1 minute) If I have to choose one, it's Night at the Roxbury.
Do you want to get lunch?
It's monday i can't eat beans on monday.
Do you want to get lunch?
I can't eat there. It's too close to the airport.